So, how was your Thanksgiving holiday? I hope that it was delightful and that you and your loved ones enjoyed it completely. We had a fun filled day. My family hadn't been all together in over 22 months...so it was a day of celebration, reconnecting, and tons of laughter.
But I actually had a much deeper reason for asking. What I really want to know is...
Was it peaceful and relaxing, and filled with joy?
Or was it stressful, chaotic, and drama-filled?
It's interesting because we all had one experience or the other...peaceful or stressful. And some of us had different experiences at the same event!
I recently came across a quote that shed light on this interesting phenomenon:
Doing something you don't love is experienced as stress.
This is so true! And it explains the difference in people's experience perfectly!
There are those people that say yes to everything...even the things they don't enjoy or even want to do. They end up feeling stressed and overwhelmed, and perhaps even a little resentful of the people having fun and enjoying themselves.
Then there are the people who only say yes to the things they love and enjoy doing...which is the exact reason that they are so peaceful and enjoying life to the fullest.
So how do you move from Team Stress to Team Peace? Easy! By learning how to say no.
You get to master saying yes only to those things that you love and enjoy this holiday season. And the best way to figure out what your true yes's are is to allow yourself permission to experience saying no. Hopefully this week's challenge of being on a No Diet will help you find the peace that lies in speaking your truth.
Your spirit just wants for you to be happy but to do that you must listen to the guidance it is always providing for you. I have some great classes that can support you with that and I invite you to sign up here for free.
Please leave a shout out below and let me know if your Thanksgiving festivities had you feeling like you were on #TeamPeace or #TeamStress...and if you're really brave, let us know how your No Diet Challenge goes for you!
Can't wait to hear...
With love & light,
These days it is harder than ever to maintain our peaceful center, so finding ways to stay spiritually lifted can be especially important. This week I will explore 3 different reasons that this is so essential to our health & well-being.
How are ways you stay spiritually connected with others? Please share your thoughts and ideas in the comments below...you never know who needs to here your words of inspiration and encouragement.
Have an amazing week...
With love & light,
We have all been reeling for the past few months from the chaos that has ensued since the discovery of the COVID-19 virus and its horrifying escalation to a pandemic. But there is another epidemic that is threatening our well being yet nobody is talking about it. I am talking about the epidemic of anger.
You don't have to go far to see the signs of anger all around us...on the news, social media, and even in our friends and families. People are suffering on the inside and exploding on the outside. It's as if the chaos they have been carrying around within them for the past 5 months or so has reached maximum capacity and now it is coming out one way or another. For some people that may look like passive aggressive behaviors, and for others it may be complete meltdowns. No matter what it may look like for you, there is actually some good news here: your anger is not here to destroy you, it is here to help you.
Help me...? What? Have you lost your F@#%ing mind? No, I assure you I haven't. Your anger is actually trying to empower you to take control and make some necessary changes in your life. Let me explain...
Anger is simply trying to show you where your body, emotions, and mind are out of alignment with your spirit. Change is necessary! It is time to get back into alignment with the truth of who you are and to start focusing on what you DO want to create and be experiencing.
So many people these days are focused on only the things that they are unhappy about and they spend all of their time thinking about it, complaining about it, discussing it with like-minded friends, and allowing the very thing that makes them miserable to be the focus of their life. They are literally choosing to be unhappy by only focusing on what makes them unhappy.
The truth is the only way to make yourself happy is to focus on your happiness with that same fortitude and commitment. Think about it, daydream about it, brainstorm with loved ones about it, and allow the very thing that brings you joy and happiness to be the focus of your life. When you do this, you will be amazed at how quickly your life will begin to change before your very eyes.
With love & light,
This week we have been talking a lot about interdependence in relationships and what that means. So I want to start out by asking you…what does an interdependent relationship look like to you? Please put it in the comments because I think it is important for us to recognize that an interdependent relationship looks a little bit different to each of us, based on where we lie on the dependency scale…somewhere between being completely dependent on our partner to being completely independent of them.
Many independent people will say that an interdependent relationship to them looks like being loved and supported by their partner. And many dependent people say that to them an interdependent relationship looks more like having more personal control and freedom. The truth is that what we want is usually the one thing that is the most difficult for us to allow ourselves to have.
Independent people have mastered being self-sufficient which is awesome. But the cost of that mastery is oftentimes an inability to trust, believe in and rely on others to be there when they need them…which leaves them longing for support. It’s not that the support isn’t available to them. They simply don’t know how to ask for it, accept it, or acknowledge that they need it.
Dependent people have mastered relying on others to get their needs met which is amazing. But the cost of that mastery is oftentimes an inability to trust, believe in and rely on themselves to make their own way…which leaves them longing for control and freedom. It’s not that they don’t have freedom or control, they simply don’t know how to ask for it, accept it, or acknowledge that they need it.
So how do we find our way back to an interdependent relationship?
First you must recognize where you fall on the scale of dependency.
Then you must recognize what you need to do to start mastering a balance for yourself. It’s not about independent people becoming dependent or vice versa. It is about all people mastering the ability to depend both on others and on themselves so that they can both give and receive love & support in abundance.
Understanding where your dependency style originated can be super helpful. It can also help you be able to acknowledge where your fears, doubts, and limiting beliefs were born that have kept you from being able to fully experience the full range of being able to depend completely on another to being able to have them depend completely on you.
The final step is in recognizing your partners dependency style. Are they dependent? Then what they really want is to feel strong, powerful, and in control. How can you support them and empower them to believe in their self? Is your partner independent? How can you help support them?
For most of us it boils down to creating strong and effective communication tools with each other. Just opening up the topic of interdependence with your partner can be an enlightening experience. What does an interdependent relationship mean to them? Where do they see themselves on the scale? What is working for them and not working for them currently in your relationship? What new skills can they work towards mastering in order for the two of you to find balance together within the relationship? And how can you support them?
If you take the time to sit down with your partner and really listen to their answers to these questions, together you will be able to chart a course towards the interdependent relationship of your dreams. And if you need support along the way I am always available for a Family Holistic Therapy session to help you work through the difficult parts together.
I had a live session on Facebook this week where I promised to send out a healing meditation to everyone on my email list that will walk you through the process of finding your way back to interdependence in your relationship. You will find the link below.
Wishing you and your loved one a blessed week.
With love & light,